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16 July 2006 @ 02:23 pm
A Poll about what I should write next  
So my body swap fic should be done in a few days and my crack!fic is constantly being updated, so I thought maybe I would do another short story spoof on something.

I've created a poll below for you to use. There's an other box for any suggestions you have.

Remember, nothing is sacred with me however if you ask me to drop Justin down that proverbial well that people sometimes request, I will. I'll do a spoof of "The Ring" where Justin is dropped down that well, literally, and then his super secret admirer, Ted, who has been lusting after him for, well, for a long time, makes a home movie and when anyone sees the movie, they experience erectile dysfunction within 3 days.

So just think about that.


What should I spoof next?

The Omen
Other (you must give me an idea)
I have your AP address Maria, and I've called a doctor at the local state mental hospital - they're on their way right now
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
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Maria: Justin condomslave_o_spike on July 16th, 2006 09:43 pm (UTC)
Justin of course! I saw an icon one day of _alicesprings's and Justin looked so evil in it.

(I could go the other way and have Gus be Damien but that wo9uld just be wrong). And it would be the original. I loved that movie.

It would be Damien, 17 years later, but not like Omen II because I didn't really like that one.

It would be completely fucked up and total crack, of course.

I really do need help...:P
Total Word Saladepicallytired on July 16th, 2006 10:46 pm (UTC)
okay, a) i'd love to see the ring...and justin down a REAL well... of course i've had an idea for a satire/crack!fic on that myself...mostly because i'm a sick bitch who does throw justin down wells.

but if you could spoof ANYTHING... i have to adm it i have a really soft spot for fight club.

you pick who's who but that would just crack me up... it shouldn't ...it does.

if you need medical help, so do i.
Maria: aliens harsh languageslave_o_spike on July 16th, 2006 10:59 pm (UTC)
I am Brian's syphilis-ridden cock. I am Justin's raging hormnones. LOL!

Shit! I guess Justin would be the Marla character and Brian would be Tyler Durden and the narrator.

That would be quite the challenge, now wouldn't it?

You were going to do The Ring? I'd love to see what you would do with that one.
Total Word Saladepicallytired on July 16th, 2006 11:08 pm (UTC)
i wasn't gonna do the ring...

i was gonna do a different satire in which justin is REALLY down a well.
Maria: Hudson Game Over Manslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 01:46 pm (UTC)
I was going to have this long back and forth with you yesterday but then my shop called because the entire restaurant practically came to a stand-still (on the second busiest day of the year I might add) because of a stupid spatula and my husband and I had to go in to referee the upset.

A spatula! I swear, children.

Then we got home, my husband threw me the motorcyle helmet and said we were going to a movie.

So anywho, you're really going to throw him down a well?! Ooooh, I feel a Lifetime Movie coming on....

I could almost see the news headlines and updates in Pittsburgh - BOY DOWN WELL DAY 5

Total Word Saladepicallytired on July 17th, 2006 02:28 pm (UTC)
exactly, justin Really REally down a well, like the EMT's and michael asking what's wrong, and brian being aggravated, because justin's down a well... it must be tuesday...

just a complete satire on justin being downa well, i'll probably never write it but the idea cracks me up.

and spatula!!!!

i've spent far too much time reading tamalinn's qafsims posts not to find the word twice as funny as it usually is.

i'll SUN but RL sucks, people suck.

c'mon, brian leaning against a wall smoking...michael running up to him in painc. "wha'ts wrong? what happened? deb making lasagna for everyone, and brian just shrugging and tossing his cig. "how the fuck should i know, kid fell down a well, gus managed to avoid it but this stupid twink... if there's a well, he'll find it.

and then he goes to babylon and gets his dick sucked while everyone gives him shit for not caring that justin's down a well...

i have four satire/crack fic ideas, that's one. and since i'll never really write it, i just post the idea occassionaly so it doesn't die.
Maria: bunny Pfft tongueslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 02:43 pm (UTC)
Okay, now I have to read Tamalinn's sims thing. What on earth does a spatula have to do with Justin? Oh God - I can only imagine...

My 18 year old sister-in-law walked into the cook station yesterday while it was BUSY, and grabbed the old spatula out of the cook's hands, while he was still cooking! She said my hubby wanted them to use the new one only.

Oh God. My cook, who's 39 and has spent more time in jail than out of it, called to whine about how she took it away from him.

Hubby and I kept looking at each other not knowing what to do - handle the sheer meanness of his sis or the whingy call from our cook? It just boggled our minds (we handled both btw).

Love the whole concept of Brian just being aggravted about Justin in the well - as if the only real problem here was that he wasn't getting any from his favorite piece of ass.

And the lasagna? The emts could lower some down to Justin on a rope. LOL! And Debbie saying, "Don't forget the garlic bread," as she throws it down to him.
Total Word Saladepicallytired on July 17th, 2006 06:40 pm (UTC)
see, you see the funny in it all.

cause you know, it's not the first time the twat's fallen down a well. and lindsay can try and get brian to admit his fears or whatever, and brian can admit that he's afraid he's gonna be stuck watching the kid get pulled out of a well on a regular basis for the rest of his life.

and emmett can maybe send downs somthing pretty so he's not in that dank space all by himeself with nothing to look at.

and justin can do one of two things, he can either be season four justin, and punch the walls til his hands bleed (not helping but not resigning) or he can be season one/two justin and just cry.

either way, fun. but most of the focus would be on brian.

maybe justin was on his way home with a pizza, and maybe brian left the beam in the loft, and now he's stuck watcing them rescue justin AGAIN! but without his beloved beam.

or MAYBE the emt's are upset he's in pain so they give him some tylenol, because nothing goes better with justin down a well, than justin being given tylenol by accident.

but he eventually swells up so much he breaks the sides , the well collapses and he climbs out.

and brian now really upset cause justin is all swollen and puffy and brian doesn't do fat or disfigured.

see... with the right imagination (obviously not mine) this could be really really funny.

but i just like the idea, i really really think this is as far as i've ever gone to write it.
Maria: Justin Uhmslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 09:42 pm (UTC)
Lindsay would be throwing dynamite down the well to help, saying that this will help make the hole bigger. See?

Then, because a bomb goes off, Brian comes rushing over to the now very dirty Justin (and at this point the swelling has gone down) and starts screaming "I Love You" at the top of his lungs, because as we all know, it takes a bomb going off the make Brian say those three little words.

Afterwards, they fill in the well with cement so no other stupid twink can fall down the well.

Unfortuneately, Ted was down there when they did it.

Total Word Saladepicallytired on July 18th, 2006 01:34 am (UTC)
yes, ted gets covered in cement...

and next week... justin finds a new well...he wasn't watching where he was walking because he was crying about something (he always cries, even in season four and five) so he's crying because someone called him a name, or broke his favorite pencil, justin's a faggot like that, and falls in a different well...and brian once again doesn't get to have his dick sucked.
Chaos..panic..disorder...my work here is done.: lj crackjillapet on July 16th, 2006 10:54 pm (UTC)
Justin as the Son of Satan. I'm in!

Maria: Frodo doesn't live here anymoreslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 01:48 pm (UTC)
I know - it would just be too good to pass up.
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Maria: Hello Kitty on a crossslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 03:14 pm (UTC)
It's starting to look like that's the one people want.

Oh God - the blasmpemy! I can feel it coming.
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Maria: Simpson Free Fallingslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 04:01 pm (UTC)
Not religious. However, I was raised in a Catholic household (mom and dad are Italians).

I went to parochial school for 12 years of my life. At the tender age of 14 and onward, I was having theological debates with the priests and nuns teaching us religious history, the bible and such.

If that answers your question. :)

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Maria: Lightening/Churchslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 05:06 pm (UTC)
My high school was actuaally very open about what we could or could not read or watch. We had some very open-minded priests. However, when I was in grade-school, right about the time The Exorcist came out was when the priests and nuns would talk about how we shouldn't see the movie. Which is funny as the person who wrote the book had been a priest and was supposedly based on real happenings.

I was in 7th grade when The Omen came out and I remember the nuns talking about it - how the anti-Christ wouldn't show up in that way and that it was taking too many liberties with the last book of the bible. We actually had discusssions about it! Most of us just wanted to watch the movie to see the infamous 'head-getting-lopped-off-by-plate-glass-window' scene.

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Maria: Listening to Satanic musicslave_o_spike on July 17th, 2006 09:38 pm (UTC)
No! I did not. One of my employees did however and she was telling me a line from the movie and I thought, 'Wow, they've taken the good lines from there and still turned it into a shitty movie.' At least from what I've heard around.

I love the orignal, with Gregory Peck (who I've always loved since To Kill a Mockingbird). The new one is just a cheap imitation. It's like Psycho - what was the point of remaking that? The originals are perfect.

I know about the whole thing with close-minded clergy. There were still quite a few of them in the church. The funny thing is though, that the most close-minded people were not the clergy themselves, but the parishners. There were hundreds of the 'Joan Kinneys' running around.

However, seeing everything in the news recently, I really have to wonder about what is going on in the churches. I know we never had any problems with that in the schools or my parish. Go figure.

I just rec'd a movie called Sanit Ralph about a boy who believes in miracles and the priest who decides to believe in him. It was really well done. My rec is a few posts back. It's on DVD - I think you might like it. It really reminds me of school when I was young.