It's a sci fi satire (and its actually not cracki) that is like The Odyssey ONLY IN THAT IT depicts a man's, along with his companion, trek to get from Point A to Point B and the many people he meets. But this is all me, okay?
And the pairings? Oh God! You have Orlando Bloom/Jesse Spencer is the first and foremost. But there is Orlando/Sean Bean, Orlando/Eric Bana/Karl Urban. There is Brian/Justin/Orlando/Jesse. Yeah. I can warn you Qaf people when that one happens. And there's more. :)
Title: Viggo's Package
Pairing: this chapter, Orlando Bloom/Jesse Spencer; eventually Sean/Orlando
Summary: Despite the title, it actually has to do with a package Orlando has to pick up and deliver to Viggo in a earth of the far future that has been ravaged by continental convergence. Along his way, he must confront horny cyborg units and different crazy factions. There will be lots and lots of sex. Lots.
Warnings: Sex, lots and lots of it. Warnings will be posted as they apply to each chapter.
Note: Jesse (and you know me, I like to include pictures of my cast) is a cyborg, but they are recognized as sentient beings that do think and are capable of emotion and free will. Not like that's all that great.
Orlando looked disgustedly at his glass of drinking water. "Oh that's fowl," he spat as he made a face.
At that comment, the blond standing in nothing but a pair of unbuttoned jeans and a collar, staring out the window, turned around and scrunched his nose in distaste before spinning to face the window yet again.
Coming up behind his silent lover, Orlando laid his hands on the exposed hipbones and slid them down further while nuzzling the shoulder bared to him. "You know, if I did this job, I would have enough credits to fix the water purifier and if there was enough left over, I could buy the necessary parts to rebuild the food replicator," he whispered as he lay a soft kiss just below the edge of the collar.
A full shrug from the body beneath him and the reflection in the window of the emotionless face told him all he needed to know. He was pretty good at reading his companion. This was impassive face/shrug combo #125 which clearly stated, 'like I care. I don't really need to eat or drink to sustain life anyway.'
Undaunted, Orlando continued. "Yeah, but then you could eat chocolate that didn't taste like 100 year old prunes," he teased as he licked back and forth along the sun-freckled shoulder, running his hands behind Jesse's round bottom. "And I know how much you like chocolate," he finished as he nipped at an ear that was all too enticing to ignore.
Despite his unit's artificial life status, like most cyborgs of his kind, they did enjoy a treat every now and then. It was an acquired taste, and he knew how much his boy loved chocolate.
Turning around to face Orlando, Jesse gave his human lover a shy smile and pleaded with his blue-green eyes.
Orlando hated promising things he couldn't always deliver, but how could he say no to that look. It was the look that screamed, 'do you mean it and if you do, please don't fuck up this time, yeah?'
Not being able to resist that look, Orlando bent down and kissed the plump lips. Finishing what Jesse had started when he started taking off his jeans, Orlando yanked the denim down quickly, baring Jesse's lower half. Slamming him against the wall, Jesse wrapped his legs around his human lover's waist while Orlando pulled his own pants down.
The two men ground into each other, rubbing up and down against the other's skin while Orlando attacked the mouth begging to be plundered. Small whimpers and moans could be heard coming from Jesse, the only sounds that would ever come out of the mouth of the voiceless cybernetic unit.
Jesse could no longer stand the wait and tried to impale himself on Orlando's exposed cock, when his lover stopped him.
"No," Orlando said emphatically. "You might get off on that, but I don't want to rip my bloody skin off." And with that, he reached over to a small shelf located within the wall and pulled a small tube of lube out. Orlando had set these tubes all over their home, just because of these impromptu scenarios. Coating his cock liberally, Orlando allowed Jesse to lift up and slide down and...
So, so, so good...
Orlando continuously thrust inside the tight sheath as Jesse slid up and down the wall. It was slow and glorious and the man thought he could never tire of this feeling. But all good things had to come to an end and despite the fact that Jesse appeared light, he was most assuredly not and Orlando's legs were about to give out.
The friction created by rubbing his cock against Orlando's torso caused Jesse to cum signaled by a very loud moan. Jesse's contracting walls clamped down on the other man's organ, making Orlando cum suddenly and just as loudly.
Setting his lover gently down onto the ground, Orlando trapped him within the span of his arms against the wall. He contemplated Jesse as he took in the flushed and perspiring face.
Because yes, cyborgs did get flush and they did perspire. They did everything a human could do. They just weren't encumbered by things like eating and drinking and, well, other things that were associated with having to eat and drink and their byproducts.
Jesse was a cybernetic unit produced by Apple over one hundred years ago. He was part of the iBoy line that produced a cyborg solely for the pleasure of men and women. His unit was the Jesse model. Looking at the beautiful, soft blond hair that seemed to flow perfectly, and the bright blue green eyes along with the smooth, unblemished skin, Orlando had to wonder if the original Jesse that his model was born from and who had long since perished was as perfect as his unit.
Each iBoy unit was equipped to give and receive pleasure and basically be the bottom boy for all males. Due to their inherent nature, they became nothing but a plaything for most females who preferred the iAlpha model for themselves, but despite the name, they too were only their for their human's pleasure.
But like all crybernetic organisms created oh so long ago, before the shit hit the fan and the earth experienced continental convergence the likes of which no one could have ever predicted (except, of course, for the scientists who tried to warn everyone that it was time for the earth to rearrange itself yet again and that we were long overdue), corporations created the cyborg units with their own self regulating cores and because of their complex combination of synthetic and organic parts, they became able to think freely.
The questions had been thrown out if creating another life form, because that was in essence what they had done, was immoral. After all, only humans had the ability to empathize, only humans had free will and could judge an act moral or immoral.
Well, the cyborgs decided differently. They decided that they were sentient beings that could think for themselves, could decide for themselves and could feel emotion just as their creators had intended. And they most definitely did not like being the lapdogs of their human counterparts.
Humans, as the cyborgs pointed out in their defense, made of flesh and bone, that could tear and break quite easily.
Humans, not being completely dense, realized what their synthetic counterparts had been trying to imply. Those dipshit scientists who had created these lifeforms, geeks and nerds who couldn't even get a date on a Friday night, had made the cyborgs indestructible.
So in the end, it had been easy to divert a war, a war which would not have been won by the humans, by granting all cybernetic organisms their freedom.
There was one man however, a scientist who was able to create a virus. It spread quickly to each cybernetic unit, their organic system making it all the more easily transmissible.
The scientist, a man by the name of Harvey J. Doofusmeyer, and yes, that was the man's name, had created a virus that made it so each and every cyborg that it came in contact with (and it happened so fast that no unit was left untouched within a period of six months) became unequivocally, leave no mistake about it, horny.
Every cyborg, whether they were male or female, could no longer keep it in their pants.
There had been factions of the lifeforms that had wanted to get back at the humans for their folly, but they couldn't seem to gather enough of their kind to revolt.
Most of them were too busy screwing each other and other humans to really get off their collective, insatiable asses and do anything.
And then when the virus settled down into a more manageable form, the units decided that they didn't really want to hurt the humans anyway.
After all, they were too busy screwing them.
So in the long run, Harvey J. Doofusmeyer's (another in a long line of geeks and nerds who couldn't get a date on a Friday night) Machiavellian plot seemed to work.
To a certain extent.
Because there were still horny cyborgs out there who would stop at nothing to fuck anyone who came along. And they could. Because they were built to last, to withstand anything thrown at them and were strong as all hell.
One look at Jesse, and despite the boy's small stature and calm demeanor, Orlando knew that the 'boy' could easily crush his windpipe. But Orlando was safe with his unit. Jesse was loyal to him and to him only.
But God did he have to keep the kid satisfied!
The Randy virus, as Harvey had aptly named it, had affected his unit just as it had all the others.
Of course, Orlando wasn't complaining.
Because just as Jesse had come to care and love Orlando, because yes, he had been declared a sentient being and all sentient beings were capable of love, Orlando had come to care and very much love Jesse.
Which brought him back to why he was willing to get the credits necessary to fix his water purifier (well, yes, that was more for him) and their food replicator (and yes, that was for him also as he had to eat whereas Jesse didn't need to) so he could give his unit this one thing.
Because he liked the way Jesse smiled. It lit his whole face and made his day on this shitty piece of land on a shitty, ravaged planet that much better.
"I got a message from Viggo. He has a job for me," Orlando said as he spoke directly to Jesse still held captive against the wall. "I just need to wait for him to call..."
"Hey...Orlando baby...that you?"
The young man quickly turned in the direction of the dirty screen as it lit up. Looking at the two-way comm, he smiled as he observed his old friend lounging on his large, white fur lined bed with three other cybergenic units.
A blond, a brunette and a red head. They were all the iHottie units, models Hope, Faith and Charity.
Orlando tried to keep his eyes only on Viggo and not what the female units were currently doing to the older man. "Hey sweethearts...enough. Daddy's got business to do," Viggo said as he shooed the girls away. All three pouted and got up, giving Orlando a full view of the naked, curvy bodies.
"Bye-bye Orlando," the blond waved as she giggled and skipped away. Viggo looked back over the departing units and turned back, a huge lecherous grin plastered on his face.
"Dirty old man," the younger man giggled. "What's the job Vig?"
"I need you to retrieve a package from Dom and Bill's place in Sector 5 and deliver it to me here at the ranch..."
"Whoa...whoa," Orlando halted as he stood up and paced the room. "When did Dom and Billy move? And why to Sector fucking 5?!"
"Yeah, I know. Sector 5 in of itself is okay, but to get to it from your place and then to mine..."
"I have to bloody cross over Sector 16, which by the way is where the Bana and the Urban models are known to be, that is if the cannibal cults don't get to us first," Orlando ranted.
"I thought the Dolcett clan was there? Don't they eat women only?" Viggo asked as he looked on in confusion.
"Just as our favorite salvage boys Dom and Billy moved, so did the clans. The Donner Party's there and they don't give a flying fuck who they eat. But at least they're human. Bumping into a Bana unit alone makes me want to ditch this job," Orlando finished as he wiped at the back of his neck. He walked over to the sink where he had put his glass of water down before discarding it and looked into the brown, murky liquid.
He turned around quickly. "And then going from Sector 5 to your ranch, I don't know..."
"You're considering it, aren't you?" Viggo asked excitedly. "I only called you because I know you could do it."
"I would have to go through Sector 19 where that crazy doctor is...and you know he's been on the look out for an iBoy unit," Orlando pondered as he glanced at Jesse.
You want an iWarrior unit? No problem. There were lots of those. Or any of the other units, such as iBuilder or even the other pleasure units. But the iBoy was scarce. There were only a handful of each model out there and the Jesse model had not been seen for a long time. In fact, according to Dom, his very own Jesse might be the very last one.
"You could handle a crazy doctor, and I know the one you're talking about. He's harmless," Viggo scoffed.
"Yeah, doesn't he have a Bean model guarding him? And Caesar's people are there. And then there's the Adam unit and the suicide cults and..."
"So?" Viggo sighed and the made his final plea. "I will seriously pay well. I've been waiting for this thing forever. Bills just told me about it about a week ago."
Orlando paced back and forth, looked over at the sink and his lunch - a plate full of what was supposed to be stir-fried vegetables and rice, but looked and tasted like seaweed. He needed the money.
Looking over at Jesse, his unit gave him the thumbs up. It was the gesture that told Orlando that no matter what he decided, Jesse would be there right along side of him.
Because Jesse knew that Orlando needed the money. He had to eat.
"You got it Vig. I'll set out now," Orlando ceded and clicked off the screen.
Stepping over to Jesse, Orlando wrapped his arms around the boy's neck. "What mess have you gotten me into this time?" he laughed.
And with that, Orlando proceeded to fuck the boy again. Just one for the road.
But in the end, one for the road turned into three.
Feedback is love.
Here's a picture of Jesse Spencer (who plays Chase on House MD in case you didn't know):